The Things We Leave Behind

Although time and geography have spread our family members apart, we still consider each other close kin to about thirteenth cousin out. Actually I’m not good at all the rankings of first, second, third cousin once removed, et cetera.  So the easiest way to explain my relationship to a cousin who visited last week is that our grandfathers were brothers.

During her visit was we shared old photos, documents, and other genealogical information.  One of the unexpected treasures that she brought was an audio tape which my mother had made in 1998, when she was 81 years old. At that time Mother was visually impaired to the extent that she could no longer read, so writing letters was no longer possible. My cousin requested that, as a gift for her young daughter, my mother make a tape of remembrances about her grandmother, (the late great-great-grandmother of the child.)

Until recently I had no idea that this tape existed. Because Mother died in 2005, it was bittersweet  to hear the tape the first time. First it brought tears, then joy to hear her voice again. I barely remember the grandmother, my great-grandmother, that Mother reminisced about, because she died when I was only six years old. So hearing Mother’s remembrances was as much a gift to me as it was for the great-great-grandchild born many years later.

All this has made me wonder what I should be leaving for my children or grandchildren. Have I told them the stories of my childhood, memories of my grandmothers, of my mother? They may not be that interested now, but many years from now would they find it as interesting as I did Mother’s tape about my great-grandmother?  From all accounts, my great-grandmother did not consider herself special, and neither did my grandmothers, nor my mother. But  each of them left a priceless legacy - funny, sometimes touching, family stories, and memories of them that warm me like a hug. What could be more special than that?